Disney says Santa’s a dick

So I know it’s not anywhere near Christmas or anything but they have this movie called Mickey’s Once upon a Christmas, where there are a bunch of short Christmas stories compiled into one movie starring Mickey, Donald, Goofy, etc. There is one story entitled “A Very Goofy Christmas” starring Goofy and his son Max. The point of this particular story is that Max doesn’t believe in Santa, and Goofy is trying to make him believe.

They go to visit this family who is not doing too well financially, and the son is showing his toy he got last Christmas from Santa – a cheap, small toy car.

"Santa gave me this one last year, but this year I hope he's gonna give me another one."

This is the part where the story also seems to focus on another point – that Max is a selfish bastard (seriously – who the hell is his mom). You see, the entire story, Max goes on and on about how he wants this badass, expensive as shit snowboard. Even after he sees how other kids have to deal with much less than he has, he still keeps going on about his damn snowboard. When he thinks he finds the real Santa, he completely forgets about the kid with the cheap car toy (Hot Wheels cost a buck at Wal-Mart right now), and is fixated on his own selfish wants, going into detail about that damn snowboard.

Finally, after a bunch of stupid shit, Max finally discovers that Santa is, in fact, real. And he even gets the snowboard.

But wait a damn minute. The gift didn’t come from his parents, it came from Santa. This means that regardless of one’s parent’s financial situation, it shouldn’t make a difference when it comes to Christmas because these gifts are coming from Santa. So Santa deliberately gives selfish Max his expensive snowboard, while giving the poor kid his cheap as shit fucking car. So, according to Disney, Santa gives the poor kids cheap shit and gives the rich kids expensive shit. He prejudices himself against kids in different social classes or holding a certain wealth status. I’m half surprised they didn’t have Santa visiting black or Hispanic kids and giving them racially offensive gifts.

Consensus: According to Disney, Santa’s a dick – but if you’re rich, don’t worry. You’ll still get your expensive-ass snowboard and go back to not giving a shit about the poor kids you were hanging out with earlier.